Swingers tend to like certain playmates or swinging couples because they feel comfortable with them. There is nothing wrong with that; a lot of swingers maintain contact with one or two playmates so that they can reach them whenever they want to play. However, as humans’ emotions have tendency to develop towards someone with good traits, there are also circumstances when emotions — the smallest amount of it at first — starts to be a factor and one of the reasons you want to see certain playmates again is because you are emotionally attracted to them. The same thing may happen to your spouse; he or she may feel a glimpse of emotion towards playmates.

What happens if one of you wants to see someone again? The best thing to do in this situation is to stay honest. Sit down and talk about the issue openly, get it out of your chest, and find new playmates you are comfortable with to change the settings. Explain to your spouse how you are concerned about the possibility of having emotions involved if you see the same playmate all the time; your spouse will understand what you are saying and will respect your honesty. It is a gesture to show that you love your partner too much and you don’t want the feeling to be spoiled by the particular emotion towards playmates. You will be stopping further catastrophe before it is too late. If your spouse asks for a temporary break from swinging, agree to it and use the time to strengthen your relationship.

Swinging is always about mutual pleasure. Both you and your spouse must accept the lifestyle voluntarily and must enjoy the process as well. The worst thing that can happen to your relationship when you practice swinging as part of it is to actually have your spouse wonders what swinging brings for them. In order to avoid that, you need to make sure that you keep the openness and honest communication among the two of you is intact, and that both of you maintain a certain level of comfort.

It is only natural that how you and your spouse feel about swinging change as you go deeper into the lifestyle. The most common reason your spouse changes his or her mind is seeing you having more pleasure than they do. You should avoid getting too carried away by the experience and stay in control at all times. You need to make sure your spouse is enjoying the ride as well, and having too much fun while your partner is not enjoying the activity will do you no good.

If you are into swinging, you must have managed to establish a certain amount of openness and trust at the beginning. Use this openness to constantly communicate with each other and discuss about various aspects of the lifestyle. You will be able to see what works and improve the overall experience. This way, you will never have to deal with disappointed spouse and both of you can have more pleasant experiences swinging together.